Taming the Tangle

A little synchronicity to share

After my last post about my Anemone series and touching on the artistic struggle, which has received some great comments here and on my Facebook fan page, I had a bit of synchronicity about the artistic struggle while watching a movie that's been on my Netflix cue forever (I'm trying to tackle some of those that have been bogging the list down). Have you seen Kiki's Delivery Service?

It's a cute, quirky animated film. I don't want to oversell it because it's not one of my favorites, yet it's sticking with me. Kiki is a young witch who is striking out on her own at 13, the age when all witches spend a year on their own in training. The lessons are those that life tends to teach, and they are all rather charming. At one point Kiki crosses paths with an artist who talks to her about following your own path. You can be many things in your life (and she lists all the things that she has been) and it's always best to come back to your true center and find what makes you happy in this world.

So great to have this message reinterated to me in many different ways over the past week... from clients to fellow artists to a cute animated film. That's the best synchronicity, when the universe sends the same message in many different forms to make sure you are listening and got it.

It also got me thinking about all the different jobs I've done in my life: tie dye tshirts, MC Hammer pants, copy girl, candy maker, mother's helper, reading to the blind, babysitter, airport "shuttle" (a hilarious time with a small Toyota Corolla and my right leg in a cast... aah, college), writer, newspaper editor, proofreader, poster designer, Student Affairs assistant, university publications designer, magazine designer, bead shop employee, freelance graphic designer... and the list goes on and has led me to this place that continues to evolve as I find a way for it to work for me.

Herb & Dorothy: an inspiration

Do you remember back to school days when you crammed for finals? That's the mode I've been in for the last 2 weeks, and this weekend is my final push. I'm finishing orders and inventory before hitting the road for a month worth of shows. Of course I will travel with supplies, but the more I can get done on home turf, the easier my life will be for the next 4 weeks... I might even be able to squeeze in some fun stuff or non-jewelry work.

Pyramid Coral Multichain Necklace, ©2011 Kathy Frey
Wrapping the pyramid and forming the links have become second nature for me, so I can stimulate myself with outside distractions so I'm not thinking too much about making 6 of these for pending orders.

My jewelry production process takes on many different stages. For my dimensional forms, the wire wrapping/enclosing stage is a time consuming one. Often times this process is meditative, but when I'm pushing myself to create 2-3x as much jewelry as I usually do in a given week I need some stimulation to keep me in my chair. So I listen to podcasts, talk to friends, watch TV episodes via Hulu, or watch movies via Netflix. Yesterday I burnt myself out on the episodic nature of TV, and honestly the emotional arcs were messing with my flow. So today I turned to Netflix and decided to tackle some documentaries that have been in my instant queue for a long time.

First up was "Exit Through the Gift Shop," a fascinating portrait of street artists and the value of publicity... maybe a wee bit frustrating for someone like myself who spends painstaking amounts of hours to create miniature sculptures that sell below value when all time is accounted for, yet inspiring and fascinating nonetheless.

I just finished "Herb & Dorothy," and endearing look into a New York couple who amassed an incredible art collection on meager salaries. There are so many things that I love about this story. The main ones are the idea that Herb and Dorothy became involved in the artists' lives, often visiting them regularly in their studios and talking to them on the phone to hear what's new and discuss the art scene in general. This type of contact grounded Herb and Dorothy in the art world from the creation side, and it allowed hard working artists to hear what's happening in the art and gallery scene while they were holed up in their studios. I'm lucky to have these types of interactions periodically, yet it would be nice to have more. I know our lives are so busy, yet what better way to feel valuable and needed and appreciated than to have a personal connection. That's one of the reasons I enjoy art fairs so much... I do thrive on that personal connection.

Herb and Dorothy also followed artists over years, buying groups of pieces over time because it gave them a sense of artistic growth and perspective on how an artist is maturing, moving forward, and exploring new concepts. Their collection is not with the intent of buying one seminal piece from each artist, but rather becoming involved with the artist and the process as a continuum. And they faithfully only buy what they like, which has a simple beauty to it.

This approach is very inspiring to me as an artist. I do have collectors out there who like buying a few pieces from me each year, and thank goodness they do because I'm not diligent enough to set aside my own work to create a timeline. Often times I will feel stagnant until I glimpse a piece from 5 years ago, or like happened to me at the Marin Art Festival... a woman walked into my booth wearing a necklace I made in 1996, 15 years ago! That's from my very first year as an "official" jewelry artist. I barely recognized the piece with its brightly colored glass and large scale wire shapes, yet I was drawn to its lively dynamism (and, yes!, I'm kicking myself for not taking a photo). It made me wonder if my work has become too restrained, or if it's merely time for some directional shifts and new explorations.

This documentary should be inspiring to anyone who purchases art and has art as an active part of their lives, yet it's also inspiring to artists to see how we help to create these people and support their passion to be more involved with art if not creators themselves. It's a 2-way street, where artists and consumers/collectors need each other... hopefully a healthy codependency. It's also a reminder as to why we need to create new work and share our explorations with people... we are the creators, not the judges. And often ideas will solidify or form direction and momentum after discussing them. Brilliance does not often form in solitude even though most art has to be made in a solo environment; this movie is a reminder that this is not a contradictory statement.

Artists, do you feel like "The Time Traveler's Wife"?

Tonight I watched "The Time Traveler's Wife," which I thoroughly enjoyed because I waited a good long while to watch it after reading the book (I've also listened to the audiobook, which I highly recommend... very well done with dual narrators).

It was a good night for me to watch it. My sweetie and I have just passed the halfway mark of when we will get to see each other in person again (6 weeks total come May 20). It can be a tough life, the life of a show artist. We all allude to it to each other, yet rarely do we get down into talking about it. Mostly because I for one strive to be "in the now," otherwise you get hung up in constantly wanting to be somewhere where you are not. That's an evil mind game that will suck the energy right out of you.

The intertwined lives of two show artists becomes a delicate dance as well... lots of calendars and keeping track of what you are doing as well as what they are doing. I don't do well with looking too far ahead when it's particularly hairy with lots of cross-country travel.

What I liked about the movie, however, is that it's a great reminder of how two people who are involved are each still very independent and leading their own lives. Your life can't stop when the other is gone, and, sadly, you can't share everything. This is hard because a lot of time, experiences, and processing can happen... you have to find ways to still feel connected and to share some of the inner dialogue in addition to the everyday stuff that's just happening.

In my own life, I find this easier to do with someone who understands the emotional roller coaster of shows and travel, as well as the emotional toll of being away from home. Shows can sound so glamorous. Over time, fellow artists can become a family away from home... yet it's not the same as being home, which is something I always yearn for even when I'm caught up in the moment and enjoying myself. This is a tough thing to explain, and it often leads to the feeling of leading two lives.

For me, at this point in my life when I am willing to take the risk of another relationship (why deprive myself of that happiness?), the movie was just a good reminder of striving for independence. I've always needed my own space, time alone, activities, and girl nights... things that are easy to lose sight of in the beginning of a new relationship where you are getting to know each other and enjoying so much time together (especially when in a new town where I don't have a solid friendship base established yet). My hand is being forced a bit, but I think it's also healthy... and I'm glad to see a movie touch on the various moments of sadness and loneliness when the alone time falls on a holiday (or even just at dinner time), over-joyed happiness at reunion as well as the sometimes anger and frustration at the forced independence that lashes out at a reunion, and those moments when you realize you or the other person has changed due to their travels and how to span that gap.

The other tough thing with show travel is how differently time moves. There are times when it crawls... the traveling between shows and that apparent "down time" takes forever (yet this can be a grand time for lots of mental processing, evaluating, and scheming). Whereas shows are super-speed... so much happens with sales, networking, and various opportunities that arise; it sometimes feels like several weeks packed into one day. There are so many stories to tell; I often feel a bit of guilt when talking to someone who is not there on the trip because it can seem like they are doing and accomplishing relatively little by comparison. That becomes a delicate art... sometimes it's best to keep it in or get a lot of the energy out by talking with fellow artists and then calming down to a normal vibration when dialing outside of that stratosphere. It works both ways, though... on the road I yearn for quiet stories of home cooking, gardening, friends, and yet that can set in that feeling of waah! all the good stuff happens without me, etc.

These are just my thoughts, do they ring true? Do you have any survival tips to share?

Playing Catch-up

Sometimes Dan, my husband, will ask me: are you always working? I'm at the point with my jewelry career where the answer needs to be "yes" because I'm playing catch-up with the business side of jewelry. Last fall I took some great entrepreneurial classes at the Women's Business Development Center in downtown Chicago. Boy do I wish I had taken these classes before I left my graphic design career in 2005, but I didn't. My business counselor reassures me that everything is okay and it will all get done in due time. So now I have grandiose to-do lists and am working on everything from cash-flow projections to choosing new gem colors to use in my designs. At any given point my head is spinning!

When that gets to be too much, one of my favorite past-times is catching a movie. I love renting movies and watching TV shows on DVD as well, but actually going to the movies is still a treat. On Saturday Dan and I caught "Juno" on the big screen in a still-crowded theater. I've been hesitant to run out and see it after so many people have shared their opinions with me, and after seeing a run of seemingly-similar quirky independent comedies ("Super Bad" and "Knocked Up"). But I loved it! The character Juno really captured my heart, even with her snarky, at times smarmy, attitude. Somehow it was all endearing and hilarious to me. It was also interesting to watch a coming of age story that wasn't preachy or delivering a particular message.

Dan is actually on the fence about the movie, which is even better because then we have lots to talk about. Nothing is harder to discuss than "I loved it" and "me too,"  so it's making the time between grocery shopping, doing laundry, and prepping for our Cooking Club's Moroccan night more enjoyable... and it was the perfect distraction from work, even though my to-do list still has plenty for me to tackle.