Yesterday I finished a pair of custom earrings that have taken me more than a year to complete. This is ridiculous, and I'm lucky that I have a very patient, artist-supportive patron. So, I'm opting to celebrate rather than feel guilty.
In that 1-year time span I have moved my home and studio, worked through artist blocks with The Artist's Way program, taken classes, done more than a dozen art fairs around the country, moved my mom into a nursing home, filled orders, finished other custom pieces, and done lots of fun stuff too... yet none of those things specifically points to just why it took me a year. So, I'm going to explain it a little bit just for fun.
Here's where the conversation started:
Client: I'd like a pair of clip earrings in your anemone series, like the Gradient Anemone Ring you created.
Me: Okay! I've never done anything like that, but I'm sure I can figure it out. It might take me a while.
Gradient Anemone Ring, photo by Larry Sanders, ©2012 Kathy Frey
That's not an exact, verbatim transcript of our conversation, but it's pretty close. I know from my very own experiences, that I should write out for myself the steps I think the project will require, estimate the number of hours as a range, and then estimate the cost also as a range, and then get a deposit to start the project. These steps are ideal because they make everything more concrete. They are essential for any project, whether doing website updates or creating custom jewelry.
The other thing that's just one of my personal FEAR creators, is that the client sent images of some other jewelry of similar designs but totally different mediums. This starts a fear reaction for me because I've been accused of copying other artists' work even though I rarely look around at a lot of other work... I've found it's the kiss of death for me and opens up the pits of despair because I feel like everything has been done and my vision is not unique. This fear reaction is not something I realized until taking The Artist's Way class... I don't have the perfect solution for fighting it yet, but I do know just to push on and keep working rather than be paralyzed.
So, right off the bat, I'm afraid and have a vague project that on the surface seems easy enough yet has no deadline. I did do some work up front because the client wanted a coating on the wire to help preserve the gradient patina. I'm shocked that even a year later I'm still learning pointers. I did opt for a light lacquer, and I want to explore other lacquer options and even the possibility of wax for certain pieces, yet I know from many experiments over the years that I need to maintain the structural integrity of the pieces and prevent webbing between the wire wraps.
The other technical challenge was to master soldering clips. I practiced by making other simpler designs for this same client so she could test them out and let me know which clip styles she prefers. I learned a lot about soldering spring mechanisms... they cannot have heat! So that led to exploring cool gels to use during the soldering process (which I much prefer to disassembling the mechanism... so hard to reassemble!).
I also made the mistake of not sketching concepts of my own. I kept mulling over how other artists had tackled clip earrings and realized that I didn't have the know-how to do what they did. This is okay! I'm self taught and always try to come up with interesting design solutions on my own... I'm a trained designer after all. My problem was mulling this over rather than putting pencil to paper. Anytime I make something concrete, I make much more progress. When I actually did sketches, my confidence returned, yet I knew more experiments were ahead of me.
Sketches, no matter how rough or basic, get you out of your head and into reality. This shows a couple of my concepts.
I knew I had to figure out how to group the branches together with something more substantial than wire (which was what I did for the ring and other pieces in this series) because I needed to solder it to a clip.
Based on my sketch (the bottom one... way more aesthetically pleasing), I was able to do a simple paper mock-up. This helped me to figure out other supplies and tools I would need: specifically a doming set and silver discs (the paper mock up helped me to figure out the size).
I still wasn't sure if I would be able to make the cone from sheet metal, so in the meantime of buying supplies/tools to experiment with, I made an Artist Date with Suzanne Himmler of Riverwoman Design who was willing to teach me metal clay... I wanted this as a backup medium for forming the cones. I even made a sample of the shape I wanted in bronze clay... way too heavy for earrings but good for me to play around with (and a more accurate model than paper). I knew I could make them in silver clay if needed.
Bronze clay cones, essentially a 3D sketch... and a fun artist date.
Another fear thing gets triggered for me... for some reason I have a hard time playing in the studio and trying new things that may or may not work, so my doming set sat in the box for months! How embarrassing is that? I really do want to play with it too... it's such fun to make metal dimensional. I seem to put pressure on myself that I need to be able to sell everything I make... this is not conducive to trying new things and entering new territory... so I'm working on that. A lot of times it means playing in copper and other less expensive metals than silver, so that's where I will head next.
This photo served as proof that I finally had the earrings underway. It was also a good reality check... I could finally supply a cost estimate based on time (I did not charge for learning and tools along the way since those are things that will benefit me).
Making the branches themselves was the easiest part because this is comfortable territory for me, yet I had not made tiny branches in a couple of years... they take forever! For custom work, I time myself so I know exactly what to charge. At this point (about a year in) I finally contacted the client with a snapshot of the progress and an estimate to make sure she wanted me to continue with the earrings and take them to completion. I had been in contact several times, but not very often... it's hard to believe it took me so long to get an estimate and explain the concept approach.
The good news is that the project was a go! So I wrapped, applied patina, and then the real procrastination (ha!) began when I had to face working with metal and soldering... still what I perceive to be a weak point in my skill set. Some day I want to splurge and take an intensive either at Revere Academy or an art camp such as Penland.
Applying the gradient is stressful, especially on small pieces, yet it's still one of my favorite processes since I never know exactly how it will come out.
And by the time I was moving on the project, it was also time for me to head on the road for a month of shows. I tend to have bursts of motivation before a big deadline yet run out of time to finish all the projects... hence my desire to cut down on travels but how will I motivate myself without those deadlines? A conundrum I'm willing to tackle.
For the final push, this week I told myself I couldn't work on inventory for upcoming shows until I had 2 custom orders done, this being one of them. I have a lot of new designs that I'm itching to explore (some of them involving doming), so I decided to just force myself. Once I'm in the studio and creating, fear falls away. One piece had to go in the scrap bin, but that's just part of learning... it's no biggie. And I gave myself a goal for finishing... the weather has turned absolutely gorgeous here, so I told myself in the morning that if I finished the earrings I could go play a round of disc golf later in the afternoon. Yesterday I went out and played a great round because I had the guilt off my shoulders.
And today I mailed these earrings to the client. Now I just have to eagerly anticipate her feedback... hopefully it's love! They are so much better in person....
I secretly want a pair for myself... I already have an idea how to adapt this to hooks.
This whole process was a great learning experience for myself. I now have some strategies for tackling fear, and I know to make things more concrete as soon as possible to see if they are even possible.